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Weekly Wrestling News – Week of April 22nd


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Cornette added to America’s Most Wanted List


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As anyone who visits wrestling news regulararly probably knows that the beefy coke bottle specs wearing mouth of the south Jim Cornette has been served papers for terrorists threats.  He has threatened Vince Russo and in a very violate way.  He has threatened to murder him.   Even though Corny has been apart of some of the biggest wrestling promotions of all time including WWE, and has enjoyed many Wendys triple cheese burgers and a litany of Sprite 0’s, he is now on Americas Most Wanted.

If you see a manager looking guy with big specs and a 230 pound gut, looking like 230 pounds of sausage, call 911 right away.   And remember, we ordered the damn shit, not to fuck around but because we were hungry, ya fuckin ugly bitch!

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The reason for Kanyon’s suicide


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There have been many speculations as to what is on the suicide note of  the late great Chris Kanyon. Many people think he was dealing with depression or he had a fight with family members. The real reason has nothing to do with that but the Grand Canyon. Yes, you heard that right.

Last month, Chris and his friends took a trip to Arizona. When they got there, one of his friends suggested that they go visit the Grand Canyon. Chris had never heard of this canyon. While visiting this, he was in shock. Friends say that he stated, “The question has finally been answered. Who betta then Kanyon? Well I’ll tell you, the Grand Canyon.”

Friends, say that Chris was not in physical or mental pain, but his journey on this planet was finally complete. All he ever wanted to do was find someone or something that is better than him and he finally did.

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Shawn Michaels to TNA


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TNA President Dixie Carter was very upset upon hearing that Hulk Hogan had let a big company secret out. Apparently TNA has been in talks with Shawn Michaels about a new deal, SpikeTV is willing to pay Michaels a substantial amount to compete for the company. Hogan has a history of doing this, when RVD signed with company TNA was trying to keep it under wraps but it appeared Hulk Hogan forgot there was a camera 2 feet from his face and flashed the “RVD” sign. When Hogan was promoting his daughters new album on the red carpet a reporter asked Hogan who was coming to TNA next and Hogan flashed the DX “Suck It” sign. Dixie Carter commented on her twitter with “Hulk needs to stop being a moron and telling everyone what we have planned.” Hogans response was, “that was weird, you sounded like my ex-wife.” More on the story as it develops.

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Eric Bischoff on VH1


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Eric Bischoff’s song that he played on iMPACT! entitled “What you didn’t know about me” has become extremely popular over the last 24 hours. It has become so popular that VH1 has asked Mr. Bischoff to play a set for the hit series Unplugged.

Many people with in TNA are also have pleased with this, the main being Vince Russo. Russo is trying to convince Hulk to bring back the Wrestling Boot Band and have Eric be the lead guitarist.

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